Got Vojo? Vojo is the women's version of mojo!

Kids are down

October 8th, 2013

Vida Jane

Kids are down! WHEW! Now…. The question… Nap, work, surf the web? Return my mountain of emails? Be efficient? Give myself some “me time”? But what the hell is me time? Me time for me sometimes is guilty mind race time. So what’s the best use of my time while the kiddos are asleep? I desperately want a nap. Oh, nappy nap nap nap. You elude me. But it’s a total waste if (when) my dreams get interrupted by a “mawwwwwwmmmeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee” so I give up on a nap before I even start. And the computer beckons me. Like a glowing bar sign to an alcoholic, the computer temps me. And I get sucked in with it’s beautiful Pinterest crack pipe. Remember when all we had was encyclopedias??? The simple life. But back then it was the t.v. that sucked my brain. And the Smurfs.

I think my PVD is setting in. Post Vacation Depression. It’s a real thing, it’s in the urban dictionary, so it’s real. Just like vojo! Ace and I just got back from Austin City Limits music festival. We escaped for the weekend and stayed with some friends and saw DEPECHE MODE! OMG! Hello high school! And we partied. And rode bikes! And boy did we ride some bikes. Uphill. After a day of drinking. I thought I was going to die. I actually let out one of those almost fake-sounding cries, like “umphuh” it’s like a cry and a “ugh” at the same time. I thought I was really going to cry for a second and then I thought “what am I doing, I can ride this hill damn it” which lasted for about a minute and then whiny self was back. Ace was all, “you can do it!” and I’m all “shut up, don’t talk to me.” For a second I thought… how can I pin this bike ride on him, as all his fault. And then I reached a downhill and thought “oh glorious downhill how I love thee. Oh look how cute we are riding bikes home from a music festival.” And then another uphill and my eyes started to cross. F-it. I’m walking.

The music festival was great. Made me want to move there. Or get really motivated to take some of my projects to the next level – ugh more for my plate. Speaking of plate… if I had a plate representing all my “stuff”, some of it would be tumbling to the floor right now. And it did. I made a big mistake this month at work which was brought to my attention today. It cost me about $1700, which hurts. I texted Ace about it in a bid for some sympathy but I know that he’s thinking the same thing I’m thinking… Ouch and UGH! I see in my future a day when a $1700 mistake is like brushing crumbs from my pants. Oh, fiddle dee dee $1700. I laugh at you! I need to sell more. I need to hire some more people. I need to create self-sufficiency in my business. I need to create systems – systems of checks and balances. I need a nap.

Nevermind. Kids are up.

smiles and Kegels

October 3rd, 2011

Vida Jane

Smokers mouth. That’s what my lips are starting to look like. And I’m not a smoker! Aging is starting to show and I’m only 37! My pubes are even turning grey! Ok, maybe that’s too much info, but I never even thought about pubic hair turning grey! Is my vajayjay getting old?

So I’m driving, thinking about my lips getting wrinkly and I think, “maybe I’ll start a smiling exercise regimen.” I’ll smile at every stop light, or try to smile for the whole route of the drive. This can help my lips and my mood! It’s harder than you think. It’s easy to forget to smile as your brain takes you places. And as I glance in the mirror I see the awful pout my face naturally forms into when I’m concentrating. Yuck face. So I thought that I needed to step it up a notch to really keep focused…

What else can you do easily while driving or talking on the phone – KEGELS! You know, those exercises to strengthen your muscles “down there.” If you don’t know about kegels, get out from under your rock and read about Kegels from the Mayo clinic. And did you know that MEN can do Kegels? I had no idea. It’s all about the pubococcygeus muscles (try to stop your pee, and those are the muscles you are using)! Exercising through Kegels can make you last longer!!! Kegels rock. I knew Kegels could help women with sex, but now knowing they can help men too, maybe there will be a Kegel revolution! Yeah, right.

Kegels and smiles. I sure hope Kegels help out my vajayjay. Maybe it’s stressed out (hence they grey hair). Exercise helps with stress, right? Now I’m driving, big grin, squeezing my nether regions and I start to crack myself up. If the driver next to me only knew….

power your own vojo

September 11th, 2011

Vida Jane

Men and women speak different languages. Most of the time I try to speak clearly in hopes that my husband, Ace, will understand. Most of the time I end up frustrated and hurt that he hasn’t “heard” me – or really understood my words. It’s like I’m the Charlie Brown teacher, “Waaa wa wa wa waa”.

The most recent battle of words has been over expanding our family. Baby number two is just a twinkle in our eye as we jump into bed, giving the baby making journey another go. But that’s the fun part. We are focused on making sweet, sweet love so that we never conceive a child through a “we have to have sex because I’m ovulating” scenario and more of a “we get to have a lot of sex right now especially because I’m ovulating” scenario. Ace seems to be on the same page with the baby making (yeah! More sex!), it’s all the other nesting nonsense that is causing the communication breakdown followed by tears.

I don’t need to get into all the back and forth drama. He’s spatting defenses, I’m spatting long-winded explanations and justifications. I’m mostly talking about the elaborate reconstruction of our house (in a dream world) and he’s mostly telling me that I’m crazy and living in a dream world, when I realize… I’m never going to get him to walk this journey side by side the whole time. In a sense, he’s looking at the path and carefully stepping from stone to stone, while I’m looking at the birds and the trees, maybe sometimes tripping up on the path, but enjoying it just the same (or even more). My views and my language are always going to be foreign to him. I can either let myself be worked up by his frustration or I can figure out a way to power my own vojo and be ok with whatever comes back at me in response.

After we reached the crescendo of our mismatch of words, I stepped away to get some air and got distracted by the garden hose, watering a particularly scorched section of lawn. GaGa, our yellow lab, came over to chase the splash that was created where the water hit the grass. As I moved the hose around, she kept chasing the splash. Watching her knocked me out of my funk. Laughter spilled out as I realized that all I need to worry about is being present. Move on. That’s one thing Ace can do way better than me. Move on. The discussion is over. It didn’t really mean anything, not really.

Be the power in my own vojo. That’s what I need to do. Be ok with my ideas and don’t rely on others for self-worth. What matters is the power I hold in myself and the love I am able to give. Being present and not dwelling on what Ace or anyone else thinks creates the power in my vojo.

getting my vojo back

September 11th, 2011

Vida Jane

So it looks like it’s been over a year since I posted! Wow. What having a baby will do to you! Our beautiful Star is now 15 months old and Ace and I are talking about number two! I am realizing I need a “personal” outlet to say what’s on my mind, whenever I want. I want this outlet to be gotvojo. Writing makes me release some of what I’m holding on to and I think other people can relate – and maybe it will help someone.

I really believe in the concept of vojo. Men and women are SO INCREDIBLY different – which is not a bad thing. I just feel that we should recognize our own power, our own vojo, that is unique to being female. So you can wish me luck that I keep this up and vojo catches on and maybe someday we’ll hear Oprah use it in everyday language. I think I’ll start glowing if that happens, my vojo will be so pumped up!

Taking control of your birth

May 4th, 2010

Vida Jane

Part of having vojo means being in control of your life and all that happens within it. I’ve got three weeks to go until the birth of my first child and I’ve been reading everything I can get my hands on. One of the greatest suggestions is to put together a “birth plan” and review that with your doctor before going into labor. I found two great sites: www.babycenter.com and www.birthplan.com which give great references for compiling your own birth plan and even set it up in a question format and produce the plan for you. Luckily, my doctor was on board with me having a birth plan and only crossed out one thing: my husband catching the baby (which my husband wasn’t really sure he wanted to do anyway). Get your doctor to sign the plan and take it with you to the hospital just in case there is another doctor on call when you deliver. I feel very comfortable now knowing everyone will (hopefully) be on the same page when it comes time to pop this baby out!

Vojo and the number 5

April 30th, 2010

Vida Jane

As I explore what vojo really means, I actually got some input from the lone male in my business. He suggested (and I think it’s a good one) that we define vojo into five main ideas – since vojo stemmed from the “V” and V is the roman numeral 5. So as we move forward with the idea of vojo, I’d like to think about it in the following areas:

vojo as it relates to your career
vojo as it relates to your sexuality and relationships
vojo as it relates to motherhood
vojo as it relates to creativity
vojo as it relates to women’s empowerment and spirituality

Hopefully we can get writers from all areas to give commentary on these different areas of vojo. So stay tuned as the idea of vojo grows!

vojo and being a working mom

April 19th, 2010

Vida Jane

I’m going to need some vojo to balance both a pregancy/new baby and my business! People ask me how much maternity leave I’m going to take and my standard reply is “two weeks”. WHAT??? Is that all????

Well, let me explain… I mean that I will be completely out of contact, won’t be checking my email, answering client calls, etc. for two weeks. Then, I’m going to play it by ear and maybe come back to work for an hour or two here and there – or work at home now and then. I really don’t know how it’s going to work out or how I’ll manage to be “superwoman” but it will work out. My business is small and very dependent on me. And although I’ve learned to delegate much better, if my business is going to survive, I don’t think I can take two months off. So pray for me and my vojo that I can be some sort of superwoman and keep my business alive! I know it’ll be great and my business might be better for it!

It doesn’t seem like men have to face this same scenario as often. I’d love to hear how other women have balanced work (especially owning a business) and new mother hood. They’ve got to have some vojo, that’s for sure.

Vojo is now part of the urban dictionary!

March 9th, 2010

Vida Jane

YES! Vojo is gaining popularity!!! I didn’t think it would happen so fast! The term “vojo” is now part of the Urban Dictionary!!!! Click here to visit the Urban Dictionary link and give vojo your thumbs up!

The Urban Dictionary definition states:

Vojo:
1. the art of being a woman
2. powerful womanness
3. a woman’s intuition
4. a woman’s sex appeal
5. a woman’s libido
6. anything related to being empowered as woman
7. the female version of mojo

Why Vojo? Why the “V”?

March 8th, 2010

Vida Jane

A good question came up today from a commenter who is exploring the concept of women taking back our mojo. Should we “take back” the term mojo that has become predominantly male, or create a new term as like vojo? So why the V, when “women” starts with “W”. Why not wojo (see Charleen Tupper’s blog www.themojoproject.com)? I think the “V” in vojo first popped in my head when I read the book, The Da Vinci Code, by author Dan Brown. Even though this is a work of fiction, Brown writes about a “V” symbol and how that symbol was defined by Da Vinci as being a symbol for women. This got me thinking…

I love Leonardo Da Vinci (I was an art major) and wanted to know more about his “V” and the symbol for women or female. My first online search brought up a site about Da Vinci’s painting, The Last Supper, on www.eeggs.com. Brenda, a commenter there writes:

“the person to Jesus’ right hand is Mary Magdalene … The large “M” that Mary and Jesus form is also cut down to be something similar to the letter ‘V‘, which is a feminine symbol. An old symbol of the feminine ‘goddess'”

Melissa, from the same site mentions:

“The clothes that Jesus and ‘Mary Magdelene’ are wearing are the same colors only opposite which symbolizes unity in the ‘V’ that they form between them is the symbol for “women“

View a preview of the painting here: The Last Supper 1498

The other thing that was in my mind when I thought about vojo being the new mojo was our lovely female body part, the vagina, being a detail that truly sets us apart from men – another “V”. I’m not sure where the slang for vagina started from, but the term “vajayjay” has made it’s place in the urban dictionary. Oprah was the first to use it on television and it has also been mentioned on Grey’s Anatomy and on The Soup. The Urban dictionary says “the term can be used to refer to the ballsiness of female executives“. Vajayjay and Vojo just seem to go together.

Oh, and guess what… vojo is IN the Urban Dictionary already! “Mojo, but with vibe; Mojo + vibe = Vojo”. That works for me too, being a lover of music.

And then there’s the question: Should we just “take mojo back”? The word mojo has become somewhat diluted. It’s definitely male dominated and there are some negative terms associated with it as well – like calling Mexican immigrants mojos. Being from Texas, this hits a little too close to home. PLUS, in the spirit of creating our own path, I thought we could just redefine ourselves, as we are constantly having to do anyway, and use our own word. So for me, I’ve got vojo. But I think all ways of being empowered as a woman are valid, whether you use mojo, wojo or make up your own word. Being empowered, sexy and feeling like you are a goddess is the most important part.

Got Vojo? What do you think?

Nothing sexier than a pregnant woman

March 3rd, 2010

Vida Jane

I’m seven months pregnant today, and it’s pretty obvious. So now people don’t hesitate to comment on my pregnancy, when a few months ago I could tell strangers were curious but didn’t want to ask the preggo question for fear I was just fat. My most favorite comment, which is definitely a boost to my vojo, is “there is nothing sexier than a pregnant woman”. What a fabulous thing to say! I’ve heard this several times now and will never tire of it. And for some reason, I actually believe it. I think the reason for this is that men are awed by pregnancy. They are awed by the miracle of life going on inside us. I know my husband has taken on a very nurturing role with me, constantly telling me how beautiful I am, how sexy I am, and making sure my needs are met. What a dream! And I love the comment “you’re glowing”. I haven’t noticed it myself, but I’d like to think that I am.

I like to close my eyes and imagine myself glowing, imagine how my aura may have changed or grown since I’ve been pregnant. When I rub my belly, I imagine a glow of energy reaching the womb, gently soothing my little one inside. I imagine this too when my husband tries to feel the baby kick or gently kisses and speaks to my belly – that his glow of energy reaches the baby and connects with her nurtures her somehow. And sometimes, when I visualize this energy as I rub my belly, the baby responds as if to say “yes, it’s working!”